Barking Back

Andrew McGowan

Rupture me on this mountain top
For I have seen the woods
Spending sleepless nights and restless days in your forest
I dare you to challenge my capacity
I stand here, begging you to qualify what I have become
My ability to feel heat, harbor daemons and embrace pain
To strike love and compassion into the abyss
To become one with my dark and tethered soul
I have lingered over far too many weary hours
Tending to the spirits and singing songs for the broken hearts
And the grey wolf howled up at the moon
As my bottle went dry and I began to walk
The devil approaches as I stumble down the cliffside
Deep in the fires of your fervent and fabulous hell
I felt compelled to go in and feel those flickering flames
But I only burned what was left of my baffled conscience
But do not render yourself pitiful for my sake now
It is a cruel and cursed battle that we all must face
When the heart is ripped out of the chest and thrown on the floor
To be eaten by the hungry vultures perched upon our necks
So strike me down into the volcano
And I will swim in the lava until I sink
Let the snakes crawl and the bugs bite
Oh please, let me feel that pain once again
And time after time again
I sense the greater forces of the earth collapsing
Folding in and out in a disfigured dance
As Gabriel blows his trumpet in a slightly off key tone
But I say let them fall in on themselves
May the powers that be remain in motion
Let the black widow make a nest in my mouth
Allow her to embed a poisonous kiss in my tired tongue

For I feel the wind all too well
As the strangers come and go through this lonely valley
But the seasons all stay the same
Because the hands of time have decided to turn no longer
And the beast from my night terrors draws near
The sonic booms of its footsteps seems menacing
But I am stronger now than I was back then
I now fear nothing and bestow fear on to all
And if I happen to leave before tomorrow’s light
I will rise from my ashes and grab your slender ankles
I will pull you down to this low and degraded state
You can cry and scream but you know that my heart is now barren of all empathy
For my sun has burned out and my animosity has been brewed
So I will ask you, one last time, to please rupture me on this mountain top
For may the God’s be my witness that I have seen the woods
And I have lived long enough to know the bitter taste of a cold reality
In the end, everybody always loses
And nobody has ever loved a monster